Knowing when to introduce death to a child is a hard thing to do. Recently, my great-grandmother passed away. Emalie really wanted to go to the funeral but I couldn't go. So I took her and Sara to the funeral home to see Mamaw. When we got there I explained that this was a grown-up place and we couldn't touch anything or talk loudly. We waited for Truly to get there and we all went inside. Sara never let go of my hand. We signed the book and smelled the beautiful flowers. They really were awesome while we were viewing Mamaw. I showed them that someone had painted her fingernails a lovely shade of pink. We looked at all the pictures in the room and told them who they all were.(The ones we knew anyway.) After a few more minutes, we all left to go to Dad and Moms for dinner. On the way there the girls started asking me questions about dying.
1.(sara) Mom was I good?(mom) Yes, Baby you were awesome.
(sara) I was scared. (mom) It is ok to be scared.
2. (emalie) How do they know you are dead? Very good question. I suppose she was worried that we bury alive people. That could be scary.
3.(sara) Do we die with our arms crossed like that? Try explaining the process of preparing a body to a 4-year old.
4.(emalie) How do they put your body in that box? This question was a follow up to the preparing a body and the process of rigormortis from the previous question. They only saw the top half of the coffin open. I explained that the bottom portion also opened.
All in all this was a great learning experience for them. It was a close relative so they felt comfortable asking questions. I wasn't emotionally distraught so I could answer them. I hope that this prepares them for the years of loss they have ahead. Not all of life's lessons are about happy things. You have to take the good with the bad.
1.(sara) Mom was I good?(mom) Yes, Baby you were awesome.
(sara) I was scared. (mom) It is ok to be scared.
2. (emalie) How do they know you are dead? Very good question. I suppose she was worried that we bury alive people. That could be scary.
3.(sara) Do we die with our arms crossed like that? Try explaining the process of preparing a body to a 4-year old.
4.(emalie) How do they put your body in that box? This question was a follow up to the preparing a body and the process of rigormortis from the previous question. They only saw the top half of the coffin open. I explained that the bottom portion also opened.
All in all this was a great learning experience for them. It was a close relative so they felt comfortable asking questions. I wasn't emotionally distraught so I could answer them. I hope that this prepares them for the years of loss they have ahead. Not all of life's lessons are about happy things. You have to take the good with the bad.
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